Monday, May 24, 2010

Fun with spam emails IV

I really don't expect a response from this guy, but rest assured I'll post it if I get one:

Date: Mon, 24 May 2010 10:48:10 -0400
Subject: I can send you $622.77 TONIGHT

Dear friend,

I would like to send you $622.77 tonight:

I am NOT crazy, I just made over $214,000 in the last two months...making money online is the way to go!

I hope to hear from you soon!

Thank you!


Go here if you want $622.77 sent to you tonight:

Date: Mon, 24 May 2010 3:45 PM
Subject: RE: I can send you $622.77 TONIGHT

Fuck you, Chris. It's bad enough you literally took a shit on my couch when we were college roommates, but to keep taunting me, all these years later, through these thinly-disguised emails is just rude. Don't forget, it was in fact YOU who first promised to repay me the $622.77 that it cost to have the couch professionally cleaned. To not only never pay me back, but keep sending me these ridiculous emails just shows what a miserable lowlife prick you really are. If I had known this was the kind of "friend" you'd turn out to be, I would've never offered to come pick you up from that filthy dive in Tijuana. Just thank your lucky stars that the pictures we took of your unfortunate involvement in that donkey show never came out, or you'd have more internet fame than 2 Girls 1 Cup.

You're a dick. Grow up and stop having a laugh at my expense.


PS- I hope for your sake your diet has improved since ruining my couch. The cleaners told me that a normal human shit would've been a breeze to clean and only set me back $50.

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